Baby Bean

We get to meet our baby Bean so soon! I'm in my third trimester and wondering how much bigger I'll get before he comes.

I've always wanted to be a mom. I never had any doubts that I would have that blessing in my life.

I have a clear memory of where I was sitting and the room around me before I had my laparoscopic surgery in São Paulo, Brazil.

I was sitting in a chair with President Horsley behind me about to give me a priesthood blessing. The words that have stuck with me until today from that blessing are, "It will be as if none of this had ever happened and you will be a mother one day." I wrote those words in my journal after he left before I went in for surgery.

I didn't know exactly what they were going to do or discover in the surgery besides drain a large cyst that had grown and filled with liquid.

I thought that would be the end of that road and that one day, I would be a mother.

The road didn't end there - we're still on it!

I went home two weeks later to the U.S. and had another surgery followed by a diagnosis of stage 4 endometriosis. More doctors, shots, and surgeries followed over the years to preserve my fertility. I have the "on-hold" music from the Utah Valley Women's nurse line memorized.

When Justin and I had been dating for a couple of months we went for a drive towards Sardine Canyon. We were getting more serious and had a conversation about our future. I told him I didn't know what it would look like as far as trying to have a family. He knew a little about my medical history and I explained in depth the possibilities going forward.

There was never a question that he wanted to be together and told me if our family was just the two of us for awhile then that was perfect for him.

Since we've been married, we, along with many friends and family have prayed and fasted for this little baby. There have been more surgeries, appointments, a miscarriage, time on our knees, and priesthood blessings.

I had received many blessings of comfort but asked Justin and his dad to give me a blessing of healing. I can't put into words "what" needed to be healed, but I didn't want to miss an opportunity for a blessing.

A part of that particular blessing stood out to me: Heavenly Father knew all that I had learned from this trial and experience. He wasn't going to take it away because of how it helped me grow and become who I am, but He would continue to lift me.

After that blessing we found out we were pregnant again. <3

We have soooo much love and gratitude for this little baby already. This is a picture from when we told my family after driving from OK to UT. So much joy.

Pregnancy has flown by for me. I'm grateful the nausea and sickness hasn't slowed me down too much. I know this is a blessing and a miracle from God. I'm so excited to watch Justin become a dad and start raising our little family.

We love you, Baby B! Now we just need to think of your name :')

xoxo, Mom

Cruising pt 2

***Writing this post at 28 week pregnant. When we were in Florence, I was 11 weeks & nauseous. Still makes me feel kind sick looking at these pictures. Hopefully that will fade once baby boy comes!!

DAY 5 - Pisa + Florence

I was amazed at how green it was. Everything was so beautiful and looked like it was from a movie.

We ate yummy pasta outside of this restaurant where a couple was playing an electric violin and cello. Live music in Italy + good meatballs = my kinda day.

Eduardo pic - for you, Lizzie!

We travelled from Florence to Pisa, a super small town.

They say the leaning tower will eventually fall over. It will be quite a while as it only leans 0.02 inches/year.

One of our shows was a fun magician. It was so cold everywhere on the ship so I walked around in my sweatshirt, socks, and chacos. Pretty content!

DAY 6 - Rome

We were sooo excited for this day because of the pics below. Highlight of the whole cruise was being on the temple grounds. We rode the bus from our ship to the temple and met up with the sister missionaries at one of our stops.

Walking onto the grounds felt like home. I can't explain it better than that. A feeling of home.

The hymn More Holiness Give Me has a phrase that says, "More longing for home." Every time I leave the Celestial Room in the temple I feel that longing. I'm so grateful for temples that truly give us glimpses of heaven on earth.

The Visitors Center sisters told us about the apostles, the mural, Christ, and the symbolism associated with each one. An amazing room that I had only seen in pictures. The Spirit was so strong. I love Visitor Centers because of my experiences serving in Sao Paulo.

Each room mirrored the Brazil VC and I gave Justin a little tour. The only difference - everything was Italian rather than Portuguese!

We stumbled upon Anthony Sweat and his tour group before we left the center. He wrote a book about the meaning behind this stain glass mural. It was cool to hear his insights.

Then we left that "home" feeling and ventured into the city.

By the time we were to our Vatican tour, we were toured out and ready to go back on the ship... I'm a little embarrassed to say we didn't fully appreciate the art, culture, and history of this amazing place.

Back to the ship with my favorite date. <3

My favorite thing about dinner was our sour lemonade we got each night. SO GOOD.

DAY 7 - Naples

Instead of going to Naples, we took a boat ride to the island of Capri/Anacapri. It was BEAUTIFUL there. We had signed up to do the Blue Grotto. Our tour guide was awesome. She got our group on a bus and we got to the other side of the island quick.

We hiked down from the bus to the water where we entered our row boats. It was about a 30 minute wait for us. By the time we finished, the wait had grown to 3 hours... Grateful for our experienced guide! She told us the Blue Grotto is only open about 30% of the year. It's a super small opening to a cavern.

The other 70% of the year, the water is too high/wind is too strong for boats to make it through the opening.

We boarded our canoe and when we went through the cut, we had to lay down flat on our backs.

The opening is just left of the farthest left canoes.

Inside was beautiful. Because of how the sun reflects through the opening, the water looks like it's glowing! The acoustics were great and our boat guide sang Italian songs for us.

Capri is also known for its lemons. HUGE!

We headed back to the cruise ship tired as ever. It was such a fun trip. Super go, go, go. I was ready for a relaxing vacation after. Ha!

We went to the airport in Barcelona and were supposed to make it back to Oklahoma that night. 35 hours of delayed travel later... we made it back. :') I hope to never go to the Miami airport again. It's where we Door Dashed Wendy's at midnight, tried to sleep on the ground, and watched Survivor at 2 AM!